The night is nigh! The commemoration is coming! The bacchanal is back! Whether you attended Shirt.Woot’s first birthday party last year or just looked at the pictures afterwards and wept bitter, lonely tears, you’d be a damned fool to miss this year’s edition. Just looking at that boffo Dan Zettwoch illustration at left has us all a-tizzy. But before we get swept away in the excitement, let’s calm ourselves and break it all down into bite-size info-kibble:

What: Shirt.Woot’s 2nd Birthday Party
When: Saturday, August 29, 7 p.m.-Midnight
Where: The incredible City Museum in downtown St. Louis

Free City Museum admission for the first 200 attendees! Just enter the museum the usual way and tell the ticket-takers you’re here for the Shirt.Woot party. If you’re one of the first 200 people to use that line, you’ll glide on through. If you’re late, well, be ready to pay the usual admission price or go home. Rooftop access will cost each of us an additional at the front desk. Save yourself the walk back downstairs later and pay for it upfront: it’s worth it.

Analog derby! Just like last year, we’ll challenge the artists among you to create an original design with nothing but your wits and our pens. Or your pens, if you spell “artist” with an “e” on the end. Fabulous prizes for the winners!

Trivia contest! Put all that Shirt.Woot minutiae in your head to work doing something besides crowding out your precious personal memories. Fabulous prizes for the winners!

Wear a Woot Shirt! Not only will you look devastatingly hot, but we’ll give you a mystery bonus prize for wearing your S-dot-W loyalty on your torso.

Costume parade! Or, if you want to take this to a clinically insane level, come dressed as your favorite Shirt.Woot tee, or character from a Shirt.Woot tee. Bring friends (if you have any) and pose for a Shirt.Woot tableau (if you know what that means). You’ll probably want to bring a change of clothes better suited to running, crawling, and climbing around the City Museum, such as catcher’s shinguards, a velvet cape, or thong underpants. Fabulous – you guessed it – prizes for the winners!

The Wootcast comes to life! Bring your lighters so you’ll have something to wave around when the Podcast Band storms the stage. Unfortunately, they couldn’t get the white grand piano or the solid-gold gong through airport security, but they’ll still do their best to mach schau.

More fabulous prizes for more winners! Not “more fabulous” like they’ll be better – just that there’ll be prizes for other accomplishments that, dude, you won’t even know about…until you win! Or lose. Probably lose.

City Museum fun! Don’t feel like you have to stay at the party the whole time. The City Museum is one of the greatest places on Earth, and you’re free to explore it all, from the man-made caves to the vintage video games at Beatnik Bobs’s bohemian hangout to the Mad Max jungle gym known as MonstroCity. Check out what we did the last time we went. And if you just can’t tear yourself away during the party, the Museum stays open until 1 AM, so you’ll have a little exploring time left afterwards.

Limited free parking! Other parking options! We’ll have a small lot set aside for our parking freeloaders on a first-come, first-parked basis. After that, you’ll either have to park in the City Museum’s lot (), another nearby surface lot (prices vary), or at a meter on the street (most are free after 7 p.m. but check your meter to be sure). We’ll post a more detailed map on the blog pointing out exactly where you can put your car.

Cash bar! Minors permitted! Free cake! That bold part covers it, yeah. Not much else for this non-bolded text to say here. Good thing, too. All these exclamation points are tiring us out.

So come one, come all. It’s sure to be several varietes of a blast. But not the variety where something actually explodes and people get hurt. See you at the City Museum!

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