By Evan Ackerman

Bust out your credit card, ’cause tonight is a Woot-Off! Woot.com normally sells one heavily discounted gadgety item every 24 hours, but during a Woot-Off, a new item appears as soon as the current item sells out. Nobody knows what’s coming up next, but whatever it is, it’s dirt cheap (with flat rate shipping). Among the items you’ve missed so far were a two pack of 1 gig Kingston micro SD cards for , a WowWee Alive Elvis for , an 8″ x 6″ USB graphics tablet for , and a USB fish tank (woohoo!) for a totally worth it . There have also been HDTVs, monitors, hard drives, routers… The list goes on.

If you’re too lazy to refresh the page, here’s a list of automatic Woot-Off checkers.

[ woot! ]

Link to the original article…

By Andrew Liszewski

A few months ago I wrote about a couple of pairs of limited edition Puma Disc Blaze sneakers that featured a Tetris design, complete with a blinding 90’s neon color scheme. I have no idea how well the shoes sold, but given how rabid some sneaker collectors can be, I have to assume they were quite popular. And that’s probably why Puma is releasing another custom pair of Disc Blaze sneakers that feature a more subtle design inspired by the 1985 film, The Goonies. In reality the shoes can only be considered ’subtle’ when compared to the Tetris kicks, since these also feature a pretty crazy design with skulls and treasure map patterns, and what looks like hemp loops on the tongue and heel. They even appear to come in a Puma/Goonies-themed burlap sack, and like the Tetris versions before them, they’ll only be available in limited numbers when they go on sale in December.

[ ALBOTAS - Limited Edition “Goonies” Pumas ] VIA [ CrunchGear ]

Link to the original article…

A glass of water sat on St. Peter’s gold-trimmed marble desk. On the
surface of the water sat a small box-like structure, made by folding up
the sides of a piece of ordinary window screen. Eyes a-goggle, St.
Peter stared in wonderment as the screen boat lazily floated across the
water.

“I give up, Don,” St. Peter finally laughed. “Why
doesn’t it sink? I mean, the thing’s full of holes! And it’s made of
metal! What gives, huh? What gives?”

The new arrival
smiled. “You see, all matter is made up of tiny particles called
molecules. Molecules are all attracted to other molecules, some more
strongly than others, and this attraction is called adhesion. The
adhesion of the water molecules to each other forms a kind of ‘skin’ on
the water’s surface, which is strong enough to hold up the screen
without breaking. This is called ‘surface tension.’ Now, er, if you’ve
seen enough, maybe I can go on through the gates-”

St.
Peter waved a hand impatiently. “In a minute, in a minute. What’s the
hurry, right? Eternity isn’t going anywhere.” With an eager flourish,
the white-bearded saint produced a glass milk bottle, a hard-boiled
egg, a strip of newsprint, and a match from beneath his gossamer robes.
“First, how about the egg-in-the-bottle trick? Please? I’ve never seen
this one in person.”

Don sighed a weary sigh. “OK, but take a picture. I’m not going to do this every time you want to see it.”

“One
step ahead of you there.” St. Peter turned on his Vivitar 8600s 8.1MP
Digital Camera. “Check this Vivitar out – an 8 MP sensor, a 2.8” LCD,
and a 6x optical zoom. That’s twice the zoom of your standard camera.
Pretty scientific, huh, Don? Ooh, I know! I’ll take a video! The 8600s
takes VGA mpeg4 video at 30fps!”

Keeping
his opinions about the Vivitar brand to himself, Don started the
experiment. He’d done it a thousand times before. Light the strip of
paper on fire. Drop it in the bottle. Set the egg on the open neck of
the bottle. SHLUP! In goes the egg,
fully intact. He couldn’t believe he was running through this banal
stunt once again, while all the delights of Heaven waited for him just
beyond the gates. But Don’s impatience turned into delight when he saw
the awed grin on St. Peter’s face. This was what he’d lived for. So what if I’m dead?, Don thought. Life is temporary. Science is forever.

Warranty:
One Year

Features:

• 8.1 megapixel CCD
• 6x optical zoom
• Macro mode
• 2.8” LTPS-TFT LCD
• MPEG4 audio & video supported

Specifications:

• Image sensor: 8.1 megapixels 1/1.8 inch CCD
• Image resolution: 3264×2448, 2560×1920, 1600×1200, 640×480
• Movie resolution: 640×480 /30fps MPEG4
• Lens: Auto focus lens
• Zoom: 6x optical, 8.5x digital
• Exposure: Manual: 1/3EV step. -2.0 - +2.0 EV
• White balance: Auto, manual: daylight, incandescent, fluorescent 1, fluorescent 2, cloudy
• LCD: 2.8” color LCD (230K resolution)
• Internal memory: 28MB
• Accepts Secure Digital cards up to 1GB
• File format: JPEG (EXIF 2.2), DCF, DPOF, AVI, TIFF
• Flash: Built-in: auto, forced, off, red-eye reduction
• Self-timer: 10 sec, 2 sec, 10+2 sec
• Operating environment: Windows 98SE/2000/XP; Mac: OS 9.0 or later
• Software: PC/Mac drivers, Photo Explorer 8.0 and Photo Express 5.0
• Language support: English, German, French, Italian, Spanish, Traditional Chinese, Simplified Chinese
• Connectors: AC adapter port, USB 2.0 terminal, A/V output (NTSC/PAL selectable)
• Power: Li-on rechargeable battery, AC-DC adapter (5V, 3A)
• Weight: 5.8oz
• Dimensions: 3.7 x 2.2 x 1.1

Tommy Baritoni watched the photo print roll out of the HP Photosmart 3210 All in One Printer. Ah, that’s the stuff, he thought, admiring the full-color portrait of his favorite band in all their early-’80s glory, headbands, keytars, and all. They stopped making bands like Journey anymore, but I still believe.
Tommy checked his watch and wondered where Marcela, Summer, and T.J.
were. They were supposed to meet him here fifteen minutes ago.

Around
him, the other customers of the Bloomfield Copy & Print Shop went
about their business. They paid only casual attention to Tommy, unaware
that here was the man who ran the largest hubcap-fencing ring in East
Jersey. Nice little all-in-one printer, scanner, and copier they got here, Tommy mused. Prints without a PC thanks to the memory card reader and PictBridge USB
port. Fast, too – 32 ppm black and 31 ppm color. I oughtta get one for
Club Fuggetaboutit, have the girls put ‘em on the glass and sell the
printouts. He filed the enterprising idea away until next week.

Just
then, a guy in a suit stepped through the copy shop door and seemed to
look right at Tommy – or did he? For a terrifying second, Tommy
wondered if the guy was with the Dotatello family, or maybe was working
for those Syrians that Tommy had ratted out to the FBI.
As the suit moved up to the counter to pick up a printing order, Tommy
tried to shrug off the anxiety that haunted him. No matter how
forcefully he commanded his mind to think pleasurably about the HP Photosmart
3210 All in One Printer, he couldn’t shake this cloud of impending
doom. He found no comfort in its built-in slide/negative adapter, dust
and scratch removal, and advanced copying features. For some reason he
couldn’t put his finger on, it felt like everything was about to come
to a sudden, inexplicable, unsatisfying end.

Tommy eased a
bit as Marcela and T.J. came through the door, the electronic sensor in
the door bleeping as they did. Through the plate glass window, he saw
Summer by the bicycle rack outside, struggling with the padlock on her
bike. “Hey, Dad, want some Funyons?,” T.J. asked, extending the yellow
cellophane bag. Tommy plucked out a Funyon, watching Summer finally
clasp the padlock shut and walk toward the copy shop door. He pecked
Marcela on the cheek and wiped away the stray Funyon crumbs his lips
left there. The electronic door sensor bleeped again. Tommy looked up
and

Warranty: One Year HP

Features:

• World’s fastest photo printing All-in-One with economical six individual inks.
• Breakthrough print and copy speeds up to 32 ppm black and 31 ppm color; photos as fast as 14 seconds
• Print professional-quality 4-by-6-inch photos at home for as little as 24 cents per print
• Save old photos scan slides/negatives with built-in adapter, and remove dust and scratches in images
• Make vivid, true-to-the-original color copies, plus new copy preview/crop without PC feature
• Superior scanning on oversized 8.5-by-12-inch with 4,800×4,800 dpi optical resolution, 48-bit color
• Print and copy without a PC simply view and print photos on 2.5-inch display.
• Direct photo printing using image display, memory cards, HP proof sheet, or PictBridge USB port
• Adjustable control panel and 2.5-inch color image display enable optimal viewing from any angle
• Easily print and share your photos memories from your camera phone wirelessly or via memory card
• Automatically remove red-eye, enhance detail in dark areas of photos with HP Real Life technologies
• Organize, edit, enhance and print photos and create photo projects with HP Image Zone software
• New automated 4-by-6-inch tray for dedicated photo printing, plus optional auto 2-sided printing
• Standard-size and panorama photos—with or without borders—print borders—print up to 8.5-by-24-inches
• Built-in networking—easily share print, scan and copy functions on a small computer network
• Send photos to friends without using a PC via included HP Instant Share printer-to-printer sharing
• Print rich and realistic photos with virtually no grain using 6-ink color with HP Vivera Inks
• Paper types: Paper (plain, inkjet, photo), envelopes, transparencies, labels, cards, HP premium media, iron-on transfers, borderless media
• Memory card support: CompactFlash Type I and II, Memory Stick, Memory Stick, Secure Digital/MultiMediaCard, xD-Picture Card
• Product Dimensions: 8.7×18.3×15.6 inches ; 26.1 pounds

Specifications:

• Functions: Color printer, scanner, copier
• Printer type: HP Thermal Inkjet
• Print speed: Up to 32 black pages per minute, up to 31 color ppm
• Print resolution: 1,200 dpi black; 4,800 x 1,200 dpi color
• Print area: Up to 8.5 x 24 inches borderless
• Memory: 64 MB
• Paper handling (standard): 100-sheet input tray, 20-sheet photo tray (4×6)
• Interface: USB, Ethernet, PictBridge
• Scanner type: Flatbed,  8.5 by 12 inches
• Scanner optical resolution: 4,800 x 4,800 dpi
• Scanner maximum interpolated resolution: 19,200 dpi
• Color depth: 48-bit
• Gray scale: 256 levels
• Zooming: 25% to 400%
• Photoelectric device: CCD
• Copier type: HP Thermal Inkjet
• Copy speed, black: 32 cpm, color: 31 cpm
• Copy resolution: 600 x 1200 dpi black; 4800 x 1200 optimized dpi color
• Magnification: 25% to 400%
• Number of copies: 50
• Recommended monthly usage: 3000
• Acceptable originals: Paper
• Display: 2.5-inch color LCD

What’s In the Box

• HP Photosmart 3210 All in One Printer, Scanner, Copier
• Six Ink Catridges (HP 02): HP Black, HP Cyan, HP Magenta, HP Yellow, HP Light Cyan, HP Light Magenta
• HP Image Zone Photo and Imaging Software on CD-ROM
• Setup booklet
• User’s Guide
• Power supply
• Power cord

Sadly, the classic 1980 motion picture starring the Village People got it wrong: sometimes, you can
stop the music. Especially if your name is Low Battery Power, and said
music is played by an iPod. In that case, you’ll find the music
eminently stoppable.

The Nyko iBoost may not completely
fulfill the promise made by the Indian, the Cowboy, the Policeman, the
Sailor, the Construction Worker, and the Leather Daddy. But hook it up
to any full-size iPod with a dock connector, and you’ll gain an extra
16 hours of music playback time before it needs another recharging.
(That equals about 39 hours in Jupiter time, but good luck
listening to an iPod while you’re hurtling through superheated clouds of poisonous gas.) The pass-through port lets you use the dock connector even
when the iBoost is plugged in. And the iBoost won’t bulk up your iPod
too bulkily, nor weigh it down too weightily. Unlike the Village
People’s ill-advised attempt to turn into a mascara-encrusted New Wave
act on the 1981 album Renaissance, this makeover will prolong your iPod’s career without destroying its credibility.

Warranty: 90 days

Features:

• Slim Design - The iBoost’s thin design adds battery life without adding a lot of size to your iPod.
• Dock Connection - The iBoost allows for dock connections through the battery for transfer, charging and docking of the iPod.
• Rechargeable - The rechargeable lithium-ion cells add up to 7 extra hours of video playback or up to 16 extra hours of music playback
• Matching Decor - seamlessly blends with the curves, color, and contour of the iPod.
• High quality, rechargeable, lithium-ion battery cells
• Works with all iPods with Dock Connector.
• Uses the standard iPod AC adaptor and wires for charging and transfer.
• Adds up to 7 extra hours of video playback or up to 16 hours of extra music

Yeah, I got the face of a Tom Waits hero but she still sits next to me at the bar. A woman like that, a woman like that makes a man feel like a Belkin 2.4 MultiMedia Keyboard w/IR. She makes me feel so full of life, just like the built in USB cord means that the Belkin 2.4 MultiMedia Keyboard w/IR needs no batteries (as long as you dock it once in a while to charge). She makes life seem simple and easy when she is around, just like the directional pad and scroll wheel of the Belkin 2.4 MultiMedia Keyboard w/IR allow easy mousing right from the keyboard, simply and easily. But the real gem is the way she influences my decisions and makes them better, just like the Belkin 2.4 MultiMedia Keyboard w/IR works as a fully functional programmable remote for almost any of your entertainment appliances. You can hook in the DVD player and the VCR while the TV watches and she’ll be just as happy as you are, even if you have up to eight different devices. And it’s lightweight and thin, just like her, which is nice because it sure makes those buttons stand out really well.

Also you can set the keys your own way, giving them up to ninety six different functions. She says this is because if you can afford to have technology that requires ninety seven different options, you can afford to have a guy standing around and doing nothing but waiting for you to say “Hey, turn off the tv!” I might be dumber than whatever plan Nicole Richie has to bust Paris Hilton out of the slammer, but even I know a woman like that is a keeper.

Warranty: Belkin Limited Lifetime

Features:

• Utilizes 2.4GHz wireless technology for optimum performance, operating distances up to 30 ft., and improved security
• Includes 27-button docking station to recharge the keyboard using USB
• Remains fully operational while recharging
• Comes with a 3-button scroll mouse and a 360-degree cursor control pad
• Integrates an infrared remote control to operate up to 8 different audio video devices
• Offers infrared smart remote with the ability to learn obscure codes from older remotes
• Allows you to program up to 96 functions with specialized programming software
• Provides long operation life using NiMH (Nickel Metal Hydride) batteries
• Lets you connect quickly with Plug-and-Play ease through USB
• Uses LEDs to alert you if the keyboard is charging and if Caps Lock, Num Lock, or P Mode features are enabled
• Eases the noise level as you type with QuietType™ keys
• Features a removable palm rest for comfort and added flexibility
• Enhances comfort with adjustable keyboard height
• Delivers comfort with attractive, low-profile design
• Features 104-button, wireless keyboard
• Works with Windows® or Mac OS®
• Software Included: Drivers & Utilities

It’s the time of the season
When hurricanes run high
In this time, you need a flashlight
You can power with batteries
Or your hands

The WeatherX Dynamo
Just in case the big one hits
It’s the time of the season for hurricanes

What’s your name?
Where’s your flashlight?
Is it hand-cranked like mine?
Have you listened
To the NOAA band
That tells you what to do to live?

Turn the crank slowly – turn it now
You really need to know
It’s the time of the season for hurricanes

(far-out five-minute organ solo, with three minutes off for good behavior)

Warranty: 90 days

Features:

• Receives AM/FM radio broadcasts with digital readout
• Receives 7-Zone NOAA 24-hour weather/storm alert broadcasts
• LCD clock with timer, alarm and back light
• 3 LED Flashlight, siren and personal security alert
• Water resistant design
• 3-way power: Hand crank to charge dynamo motor, AC Adaptor (not included) and “AA” batteries (not included)
• DC jack terminal for charging power input or output
• Heavy duty dynamo motor for power generation
• 2-rechargeable Ni-Cad batteries (included)
• Convenient fold-away carrying handle

Saturday night at Club Panther. The waitress set the Bacardi &
OJ on the table in front of Hamilton Beach, private dick and stone
righteous brother. “You read my mind, baby,” Beach said, “But unless
I’m higher than I thought, I didn’t order this.”

“Compliments
of the lady at the bar,” the waitress explained. “The one in the green
velvet vest and the brown leather boots.” From ten yards away, the lady
in question shot Beach a smile that could melt the ice on Lake Erie in
January. Nothing wrong with her that Beach could see, nothing at all.
But if he trusted every mysterious woman with a pretty face, he’d have
been dead a long time ago. He picked up the drink and nonchalantly
strolled over to her, taking the next stool at the bar.

“Many
thanks, sweet thing. My favorite, you know.” Beach lifted the glass in
salute, with a couple of shakes. He lit a Kool, blew the smoke
sideways, and continued, “But tell me – what’s your game?”

The smile again, the ice-melting smile. “Games are for little boys and girls. I’m a full-grown woman, Mr. Beach. Very full-grown.”

“I
can see that, baby. But I just find it funny, you know. I mean, it
seems a little odd, you trying to make time with me with that shipment
of Hamilton Beach BlenderChef Blender/Food Processors due in from
Detroit in half an hour. I know the Rabbit would love to get his hands
on those – glass jar, stanless steel blades, 12 speeds from ‘stir’ all
the way up to ‘liquefy’. I know the Rabbit can’t resist a 400-watt
motor. And here you are, treating me to a drink just when that truck is
rolling toward town. Quite a coincidence. You wouldn’t know anything
about that, would you?”

Her brows lifted the smallest
distance, for the briefest instant. She was keeping it together pretty
good, Beach had to gve her that. “I don’t know what you’re talking
about. Why can’t a woman buy a drink for a good-looking stranger
without -”

“See, see, that’s the thing,” Beach
interrupted. “You say ‘stranger’, but a minute ago you knew my name.
How do you figure that?”

Her hand darted into her handbag
on the bar. Immediately Beach’s muscled grip was around her hand,
clamping it through the fabric of the purse. Beach could tell there was
something heavy in the bag: a gun, a blade. Something nasty. “I
wouldn’t if I were you, baby,” he commanded, looking right into her
panic-racked eyes. “Here’s how it’s gonna go down. I’m gonna take your
purse outside with me, on my way out. After I take out anything that
shouldn’t be there, I’ll leave it behind the shrubs outside. You wait
two minutes and you can go get your purse back. Me, I got an
appointment with some of your fellow employees of the Rabbit. I’ll tell
them you said hello.”

Dazed, she withdrew her empty hand
and watched Beach leave the club. What a man. For a moment, she wished
she could’ve bought him a drink under different circumstances. Then she
wondered what she was going to tell the Rabbit.

Warranty: 2 years

Features:

• 400 watts of power
• Blender and food processor in one
• Stainless steel blades
• Stir stick for stirring while you blend
• Liquid dispenser
• 40-oz. jar for multiple servings
• SureRest jar rest that prevents tipping
• Liquid dispenser for adding oil or other ingredients
• Hide-away cord storage.
• Dimensions: 13Hx6.25Wx8.5L”.

Don’t be fooled by the superficial peace in your office right now.
Sure, everything might seem nice and placid, for the moment. Boring,
even. But make no mistake: as you blissfully type away, your enemies
are out there somewhere, waiting for their chance to invade your
cubicle and destroy your way of life, to sprinkle unfamiliar orange
snack-food crumbs into your keyboard and reset your Windows wallpaper
to something pornographic. When the thin veneer of civilization cracks
and your office descends into a brutal Darwinian free-for-all, as all
offices do eventually, will you be ready?

With this USB Missile
Launcher, you’ll have the defensive capability you need to ensure the
integrity of your borders. Attacks from rogue cubicles can be met with
an overwhelming response of sheer foam-rubber force. Chances are the
barbarians will move on at the mere sight of your awesome toy arsenal.
If not, your course of action is clear: identify the enemy, target the
missiles on your PC with a Windows XP-based guidance system, and take
appropriate action to rectify the hell out of the situation.

In
mere minutes, even the calmest workplace can turn into a blood-soaked
abattoir of human misery, a cut-throat killing field where only the
sociopathic and the well-armed will survive. Military experts say the
war in Chechnya started when a pudding cup went missing from an office
fridge. The USB Missile Launcher might be all that stands between you and total annihilation. Plus, it’s lots of fun.

Warranty: One Year

Specifications:

• USB powered, no batteries required
• Computer Guidance System, target acquisition controlled via keyboard or mouse
• Compatible with Windows XP
• Includes 3 foam missles and a target
• 3′ long USB Cable attached
• Rotates 360 degrees and approx 45 degrees up/down
• Pre-recorded Sound Effects (PC with Speakers Required)
• Download your own sound effects and add them to your program
• Shoots up to 20 feet at an extremely fast rate
• Includes CD with software, user guide, quick start guide 

Wouldn’t it be nice if the real implements of war were more like today’s USB Missile Launcher: too weak, squishy, and small to do any real damage? A society where all disputes - between nation and nation, between worker and co-worker, between husband and wife, between plaintiff and defendant - were settled by recourse to toy combat would be a more humane society. More to the point, it would be a more entertaining one. That’s what we’re hoping, anyway. Your challenge:

Show us people resolving their differences by fighting with toys.

Obvious ideas suggest themselves, but remember, inventiveness pays. We’re not really looking for water guns full of acid or eyeballs impaled on jacks, but we’re sure a lot of you will come up with that sort of thing anyway. Vault over the vulgar herd on a pole made of cleverness and wit, and riches will find you.

Post your entry here by 11:59 PM CDT on Sunday, June 17, 2007.
Prizes are $40/$100/$200 for 3rd/2nd/1st (rolled over from Contest 126). The rules and criteria for
winning: our panel of geniuses can and will make stuff up as it goes
along. Use Photoshop, pen and ink, collage, MSPaint, scrimshaw carving,
tattoos, ice sculpture, whatever, but it’ll only be judged if it’s
visible in our forums as a jpg, gif, or png. As we are fond of saying, try to keep your maximum
width to 450px. If you need a place to host your pictures, try www.imageshack.ws or www.photobucket.com.
We have no connection to either, but they seem free and easy to use.
And if you want us to be sure your entry was indeed your work, post
links to your source images. The more sure we are that you did your own
work, the more likely we are to consider it for a prize.

Past money winners:
If you’d like to nominate any entries from this week’s contest, email
your selections (with links to each individual post) to Jason Toon at jtoon@woot.com by noon CDT on Monday, June 18.

A glass of water sat on St. Peter’s gold-trimmed marble desk. On the
surface of the water sat a small box-like structure, made by folding up
the sides of a piece of ordinary window screen. Eyes a-goggle, St.
Peter stared in wonderment as the screen boat lazily floated across the
water.

“I give up, Don,” St. Peter finally laughed. “Why
doesn’t it sink? I mean, the thing’s full of holes! And it’s made of
metal! What gives, huh? What gives?”

The new arrival
smiled. “You see, all matter is made up of tiny particles called
molecules. Molecules are all attracted to other molecules, some more
strongly than others, and this attraction is called adhesion. The
adhesion of the water molecules to each other forms a kind of ‘skin’ on
the water’s surface, which is strong enough to hold up the screen
without breaking. This is called ‘surface tension.’ Now, er, if you’ve
seen enough, maybe I can go on through the gates-”

St.
Peter waved a hand impatiently. “In a minute, in a minute. What’s the
hurry, right? Eternity isn’t going anywhere.” With an eager flourish,
the white-bearded saint produced a glass milk bottle, a hard-boiled
egg, a strip of newsprint, and a match from beneath his gossamer robes.
“First, how about the egg-in-the-bottle trick? Please? I’ve never seen
this one in person.”

Don sighed a weary sigh. “OK, but take a picture. I’m not going to do this every time you want to see it.”

“One
step ahead of you there.” St. Peter turned on his Vivitar 8600s 8.1MP
Digital Camera. “Check this Vivitar out – an 8 MP sensor, a 2.8” LCD,
and a 6x optical zoom. That’s twice the zoom of your standard camera.
Pretty scientific, huh, Don? Ooh, I know! I’ll take a video! The 8600s
takes VGA mpeg4 video at 30fps!”

Keeping
his opinions about the Vivitar brand to himself, Don started the
experiment. He’d done it a thousand times before. Light the strip of
paper on fire. Drop it in the bottle. Set the egg on the open neck of
the bottle. SHLUP! In goes the egg,
fully intact. He couldn’t believe he was running through this banal
stunt once again, while all the delights of Heaven waited for him just
beyond the gates. But Don’s impatience turned into delight when he saw
the awed grin on St. Peter’s face. This was what he’d lived for. So what if I’m dead?, Don thought. Life is temporary. Science is forever.

Warranty:
One Year

Features:

• 8.1 megapixel CCD
• 6x optical zoom
• Macro mode
• 2.8” LTPS-TFT LCD
• MPEG4 audio & video supported

Specifications:

• Image sensor: 8.1 megapixels 1/1.8 inch CCD
• Image resolution: 3264×2448, 2560×1920, 1600×1200, 640×480
• Movie resolution: 640×480 /30fps MPEG4 
• Lens: Auto focus lens
• Zoom: 6x optical, 8.5x digital
• Exposure: Manual: 1/3EV step. -2.0 - +2.0 EV
• White balance: Auto, manual: daylight, incandescent, fluorescent 1, fluorescent 2, cloudy
• LCD: 2.8” color LCD (230K resolution)
• Internal memory: 28MB
• Accepts Secure Digital cards up to 1GB
• File format: JPEG (EXIF 2.2), DCF, DPOF, AVI, TIFF
• Flash: Built-in: auto, forced, off, red-eye reduction
• Self-timer: 10 sec, 2 sec, 10+2 sec
• Operating environment: Windows 98SE/2000/XP; Mac: OS 9.0 or later
• Software: PC/Mac drivers, Photo Explorer 8.0 and Photo Express 5.0
• Language support: English, German, French, Italian, Spanish, Traditional Chinese, Simplified Chinese
• Connectors: AC adapter port, USB 2.0 terminal, A/V output (NTSC/PAL selectable)
• Power: Li-on rechargeable battery, AC-DC adapter (5V, 3A)
• Weight: 5.8oz
• Dimensions: 3.7 x 2.2 x 1.1

Tommy Baritoni watched the photo print roll out of the HP Photosmart 3210 All in One Printer. Ah, that’s the stuff, he thought, admiring the full-color portrait of his favorite band in all their early-’80s glory, headbands, keytars, and all. They stopped making bands like Journey anymore, but I still believe.
Tommy checked his watch and wondered where Marcela, Summer, and T.J.
were. They were supposed to meet him here fifteen minutes ago.

Around
him, the other customers of the Bloomfield Copy & Print Shop went
about their business. They paid only casual attention to Tommy, unaware
that here was the man who ran the largest hubcap-fencing ring in East
Jersey. Nice little all-in-one printer, scanner, and copier they got here, Tommy mused. Prints without a PC thanks to the memory card reader and PictBridge USB
port. Fast, too – 32 ppm black and 31 ppm color. I oughtta get one for
Club Fuggetaboutit, have the girls put ‘em on the glass and sell the
printouts. He filed the enterprising idea away until next week.

Just
then, a guy in a suit stepped through the copy shop door and seemed to
look right at Tommy – or did he? For a terrifying second, Tommy
wondered if the guy was with the Dotatello family, or maybe was working
for those Syrians that Tommy had ratted out to the FBI.
As the suit moved up to the counter to pick up a printing order, Tommy
tried to shrug off the anxiety that haunted him. No matter how
forcefully he commanded his mind to think pleasurably about the HP Photosmart
3210 All in One Printer, he couldn’t shake this cloud of impending
doom. He found no comfort in its built-in slide/negative adapter, dust
and scratch removal, and advanced copying features. For some reason he
couldn’t put his finger on, it felt like everything was about to come
to a sudden, inexplicable, unsatisfying end.

Tommy eased a
bit as Marcela and T.J. came through the door, the electronic sensor in
the door bleeping as they did. Through the plate glass window, he saw
Summer by the bicycle rack outside, struggling with the padlock on her
bike. “Hey, Dad, want some Funyons?,” T.J. asked, extending the yellow
cellophane bag. Tommy plucked out a Funyon, watching Summer finally
clasp the padlock shut and walk toward the copy shop door. He pecked
Marcela on the cheek and wiped away the stray Funyon crumbs his lips
left there. The electronic door sensor bleeped again. Tommy looked up
and

Warranty: One Year HP

Features:

• World’s fastest photo printing All-in-One with economical six individual inks.
• Breakthrough print and copy speeds up to 32 ppm black and 31 ppm color; photos as fast as 14 seconds
• Print professional-quality 4-by-6-inch photos at home for as little as 24 cents per print
• Save old photos scan slides/negatives with built-in adapter, and remove dust and scratches in images
• Make vivid, true-to-the-original color copies, plus new copy preview/crop without PC feature
• Superior scanning on oversized 8.5-by-12-inch with 4,800×4,800 dpi optical resolution, 48-bit color
• Print and copy without a PC simply view and print photos on 2.5-inch display.
• Direct photo printing using image display, memory cards, HP proof sheet, or PictBridge USB port
• Adjustable control panel and 2.5-inch color image display enable optimal viewing from any angle
• Easily print and share your photos memories from your camera phone wirelessly or via memory card
• Automatically remove red-eye, enhance detail in dark areas of photos with HP Real Life technologies
• Organize, edit, enhance and print photos and create photo projects with HP Image Zone software
• New automated 4-by-6-inch tray for dedicated photo printing, plus optional auto 2-sided printing
• Standard-size and panorama photos—with or without borders—print borders—print up to 8.5-by-24-inches
• Built-in networking—easily share print, scan and copy functions on a small computer network
• Send photos to friends without using a PC via included HP Instant Share printer-to-printer sharing
• Print rich and realistic photos with virtually no grain using 6-ink color with HP Vivera Inks
• Paper types: Paper (plain, inkjet, photo), envelopes, transparencies, labels, cards, HP premium media, iron-on transfers, borderless media
• Memory card support: CompactFlash Type I and II, Memory Stick, Memory Stick, Secure Digital/MultiMediaCard, xD-Picture Card
• Product Dimensions: 8.7×18.3×15.6 inches ; 26.1 pounds

Specifications:

• Functions: Color printer, scanner, copier
• Printer type: HP Thermal Inkjet
• Print speed: Up to 32 black pages per minute, up to 31 color ppm
• Print resolution: 1,200 dpi black; 4,800 x 1,200 dpi color
• Print area: Up to 8.5 x 24 inches borderless
• Memory: 64 MB
• Paper handling (standard): 100-sheet input tray, 20-sheet photo tray (4×6)
• Interface: USB, Ethernet, PictBridge
• Scanner type: Flatbed,  8.5 by 12 inches
• Scanner optical resolution: 4,800 x 4,800 dpi
• Scanner maximum interpolated resolution: 19,200 dpi
• Color depth: 48-bit
• Gray scale: 256 levels
• Zooming: 25% to 400%
• Photoelectric device: CCD
• Copier type: HP Thermal Inkjet
• Copy speed, black: 32 cpm, color: 31 cpm
• Copy resolution: 600 x 1200 dpi black; 4800 x 1200 optimized dpi color
• Magnification: 25% to 400%
• Number of copies: 50
• Recommended monthly usage: 3000
• Acceptable originals: Paper
• Display: 2.5-inch color LCD

What’s In the Box

• HP Photosmart 3210 All in One Printer, Scanner, Copier
• Six Ink Catridges (HP 02): HP Black, HP Cyan, HP Magenta, HP Yellow, HP Light Cyan, HP Light Magenta
• HP Image Zone Photo and Imaging Software on CD-ROM
• Setup booklet
• User’s Guide
• Power supply
• Power cord

We come before you in atonement. Looking at it in the hard light of day, it seems our contest 126 theme - Show us some unexpected ways to make sound effects - was a little on the lame side. We were disappointed that the vast majority of the entries basically pasted a boom mic into an existing picture, until we realized that it’s not your fault. We left you little other option. So we’re going to invoke the nuclear option: declare no cash winners and roll the prize money over to the next contest. All money prizes will be doubled for Contest 127. We still want to recognize those entrants who somewhow managed to transcend our muddled thinking this week, so here are some Honorable Mentions. This week, they’re especially honorable.

Honorable Mention

biggandyy - Low Score

Josephus - Holy Foley, Batman

LKK - Immobile Mobile

wachin - Jonesophone

Lurker256 - Get The Munchies

tgentry - Cotton-Eye Sound

KMA2 - Refreshicopter

faithcoaching - Listen to the Band

Champions’ Championship Champion
carmicha - Easy Joker
Only one former champ sent in a ballot, and this was the only one on his list that wasn’t on ours. Still, a win is a win.

Who’s
to blame for the naked-toilet-porch guy pic that keeps showing up in so
many entries? The photographer? The person who first posted it on the
Internet? Naked toilet porch guy himself? Or us, for awarding the Monkey Prize to naked-toilet-porch fans like afanco?

We have failed you, and it tears us up inside. Monkey Prize winner, please email your shipping address to jtoon@woot.com. Honorable Mentioneers may use coupon code HONMEN-FS
for free shipping on a future order. Until next time, remember that
we’re going double-stakes for Contest 127, so sharpen your chops,
choppen your sharps, bring your A game (your B and C game wouldn’t hurt either). And we’ll try to do the same.

Sadly, the classic 1980 motion picture starring the Village People got it wrong: sometimes, you can
stop the music. Especially if your name is Low Battery Power, and said
music is played by an iPod. In that case, you’ll find the music
eminently stoppable.

The Nyko iBoost may not completely
fulfill the promise made by the Indian, the Cowboy, the Policeman, the
Sailor, the Construction Worker, and the Leather Daddy. But hook it up
to any full-size iPod with a dock connector, and you’ll gain an extra
16 hours of music playback time before it needs another recharging.
(That equals about 39 hours in Jupiter time, but good luck
listening to an iPod while you’re hurtling through superheated clouds of poisonous gas.) The pass-through port lets you use the dock connector even
when the iBoost is plugged in. And the iBoost won’t bulk up your iPod
too bulkily, nor weigh it down too weightily. Unlike the Village
People’s ill-advised attempt to turn into a mascara-encrusted New Wave
act on the 1981 album Renaissance, this makeover will prolong your iPod’s career without destroying its credibility.

Warranty: 90 days

Features:

• Slim Design - The iBoost’s thin design adds battery life without adding a lot of size to your iPod.
• Dock Connection - The iBoost allows for dock connections through the battery for transfer, charging and docking of the iPod.
• Rechargeable - The rechargeable lithium-ion cells add up to 7 extra hours of video playback or up to 16 extra hours of music playback
• Matching Decor - seamlessly blends with the curves, color, and contour of the iPod.
• High quality, rechargeable, lithium-ion battery cells
• Works with all iPods with Dock Connector.
• Uses the standard iPod AC adaptor and wires for charging and transfer.
• Adds up to 7 extra hours of video playback or up to 16 hours of extra music

Yeah, I got the face of a Tom Waits hero but she still sits next to me at the bar. A woman like that, a woman like that makes a man feel like a Belkin 2.4 MultiMedia Keyboard w/IR. She makes me feel so full of life, just like the built in USB cord means that the Belkin 2.4 MultiMedia Keyboard w/IR needs no batteries (as long as you dock it once in a while to charge). She makes life seem simple and easy when she is around, just like the directional pad and scroll wheel of the Belkin 2.4 MultiMedia Keyboard w/IR allow easy mousing right from the keyboard, simply and easily. But the real gem is the way she influences my decisions and makes them better, just like the Belkin 2.4 MultiMedia Keyboard w/IR works as a fully functional programmable remote for almost any of your entertainment appliances. You can hook in the DVD player and the VCR while the TV watches and she’ll be just as happy as you are, even if you have up to eight different devices. And it’s lightweight and thin, just like her, which is nice because it sure makes those buttons stand out really well.

Also you can set the keys your own way, giving them up to ninety six different functions. She says this is because if you can afford to have technology that requires ninety seven different options, you can afford to have a guy standing around and doing nothing but waiting for you to say “Hey, turn off the tv!” I might be dumber than whatever plan Nicole Richie has to bust Paris Hilton out of the slammer, but even I know a woman like that is a keeper.

Warranty: Belkin Limited Lifetime

Features:

• Utilizes 2.4GHz wireless technology for optimum performance, operating distances up to 30 ft., and improved security
• Includes 27-button docking station to recharge the keyboard using USB
• Remains fully operational while recharging
• Comes with a 3-button scroll mouse and a 360-degree cursor control pad
• Integrates an infrared remote control to operate up to 8 different audio video devices
• Offers infrared smart remote with the ability to learn obscure codes from older remotes
• Allows you to program up to 96 functions with specialized programming software
• Provides long operation life using NiMH (Nickel Metal Hydride) batteries
• Lets you connect quickly with Plug-and-Play ease through USB
• Uses LEDs to alert you if the keyboard is charging and if Caps Lock, Num Lock, or P Mode features are enabled
• Eases the noise level as you type with QuietType™ keys
• Features a removable palm rest for comfort and added flexibility
• Enhances comfort with adjustable keyboard height
• Delivers comfort with attractive, low-profile design
• Features 104-button, wireless keyboard
• Works with Windows® or Mac OS®
• Software Included: Drivers & Utilities